Friday, June 25, 2010


Sitting with my acting coach and fellow classmates one night; waiting for another classmate to get ready for a scene and performance; we came upon the topic of humility. I deem my professor a very wise and wonderful man; a true and fine father and husband with child-like zeal in his love for being vulnerable to life's situations and converting this into the art of acting. I admire him very much and have learnt so much about life in general from him. However the comment that he made left me feeling quite troubled.

I have found out that to be a good actor, the confidence level of that person should be high. If a person has no confidence in themselves or their abilities; 9 times out of 10 they will fail at being able to carry out their duties as a character in a scene while acting. Actors happen to be quite seemingly self-assured people; and those who are not, are not very good at it; or substitute their fears by abusing drugs and alcohol. So now, in retrospect, it shouldn't have bothered me that my acting coach would make a statement like this in the first place.

He expressed lightly that he didn't find it necessary to teach children to be humble. He didn't understand it, didn't find the importance in it and said if his daughter were to gain an A in an assignment, she should be able to smile and stand proudly for what she had achieved. I saw his significance in this however I couldn't agree fully. The other students sitting in his daughter's class, would have different reactions to her emotional output. Some would be positive and others who didn't do as well may be jealous or even sad. The students in my class didn't see the relevance in my 'then' argument and agreed strongly with my professor's point of view. One classmate even said that when she lived in the East for a couple years, they were always so humble, bowing ever so much and she thought it was absurd and almost comical at times even. I was filled in a room of Americans; in fact I am surrounded by them mostly as I reside in the United States. I do not judge them; but wish I could help them see different points of view. Each country around the world that I've had the opportunity to frequent and visit have different cultural upbringing and reasoning and so I could recognize why they had comparable insight.

I am not from the East; however my great grandfather migrated to Trinidad & Tobago from Hong-Kong. Through my family upbringing as well as being tolerant and taught about different religions and cultures in my country; I am more open-minded and sensitive towards different people's thought processes. It is the most important to be respectful to parents, elderly and authority, but most importantly respect to each other; and after that being humble. My people are for the most part very passive.

I certainly think that it is important to be proud of achievements you have made in life and also to not sit back and let people take advantage of you, however I believe also that it is pertinent to teach our young ones about humility because it is an essential quality in spiritual life; and not only that but it is an outward expression of the desire to go beyond the ego. The ego is a very serious thing; what kind of presence do you want to have in a room? Would you rather one of modesty or one of arrogance? Which sort of person do you prefer to keep company with? We must ask ourselves these questions…

Life is all about impermanence; which means that nothing lasts forever. Your wealth, health, and happiness can be taken away or changed in the blink of an eye. If one were to go around boasting or being smug about their fortunate moments; it would be more than dreadful for them when they fall. In that respect we must remember not to be self-righteous or haughty in life's situations because everything is unpredictable and sacred. Therefore when children are proud of their achievements we must tell them to smile and be grateful but also to be humble about the situation; it comes back to the point of respect for others. Respect for life, respect to nature, respect to fellow beings; for if you were to project this negative energy toward them, more times than less a negative return could be returned.

There are so many stories I can share of why we must be humble but I will just share this one that a lovely friend shared with me:

"I was in high school back then; and he was the most handsome boy I ever saw. He was so good-looking; and he knew it. He walked around without a care in the world, and he would play pranks on classmates and also some neighbours. He never got caught and he had the world eating out of his hand. One day he decided to interfere once more with a neighbour by throwing rocks at his window; the old man was known for his impatience towards the young mischievous children around him. What the handsome boy did not know was that the old man had purchased a gun. That night something in the old man snapped, and he limped outside and shot the boy in the head. The boy went into a coma for many months; he was unable to finish his last year of high school with his classmates, instead hoping to recover from this terrible trauma. He was lucky enough to come back to his family and to life; however he was left blind. He could no longer walk around arrogantly and poke fun and be mischievous to students or neighbours."

I'm sure this boy learn't his lesson; however he had to learn the hard way. Teach your children and young ones about respect for each other and humility now; or one day it may be too late.

An Education

I must say anytime I watch an English or Scottish film I feel all tingly inside because the words they use remind me so much of home. True the Caribbean has African, East-Indian, Syrian, Chinese, Spanish, French and Dutch influences; but the Brits and the Scots in most cases ruled us the last and the longest. I smiled when I heard them speak of tea and biscuits; very common in Trinidad & Tobago, and when the girls spoke of nighties', A-levels and wore uniforms, it brought back so many memories.

I have been wanting to see a Carey Mulligan film since the 2010 Academy Awards as she was new on the scene and had many nominations for her films; I found this film An Education a wonderful one to start with, really confirming her brilliant talent. I'd also want to see her because she was the one lucky enough to snatch Shia LaBeouf before I could get to him; no animosity towards her however; only kudos to his good international taste! J

I must admit I was even more thrilled to see that Emma Thompson had a small part in the film as well. She is definitely one of my favourite people to watch; and I absolutely loved her in one of my beloved films entitled Wit. An Education was set in Mulligan's home-town, the United Kingdom, and I must say it was a magnificent cinematic ride that I think all young girls should take. The script/story of films should always be at the forefront, if you get lost in fluff and antics then I believe the film-maker has failed in spreading the main message to its audience. I believe the writer Lynn Barber & Nick Hornby, and director, Lone Scherfig of this film did a wonderful job at making sure to do just that; spreading the message.

There were some superb camera techniques in this film. I always like when camera-men are able to show reflections in mirrors and capture reflections within car windows; not everyone can pull that off. The soundtrack was good too, I found myself singing along to Smoke without Fire written by Bernard Butler and performed by Duffy. Carey's performance was without a doubt marvelous; I must say she did her part great justice. Some of the logic behind the film though didn't make much sense to me; I found her parents; especially her father's behaviour to be completely wild. He was quite adamant in the beginning about her finishing her secondary schooling to begin her tertiary level education at Oxford University, however it seemed as though just overnight he found it acceptable to have her throw everything away to marry a seemingly wealthy man who was thrice her age. I found that move rather poor and baffling as not only for a parent but also as a father knowing what the world is about. I call it a 'Pride & Prejudice' move; I find it always important for a woman to be able to stand on her own 2 feet and accrue her own wealth, that way no-one would be able to take advantage of her or have her helpless if the relationship goes sour.

Although Notes on a Scandal and The Reader had similar disturbing mis-fit relationship attributes, I found the relationship between Carrie Mulligan (Jenny) and Jack played by Alfred Molina to be more absorbing because even though their ages were enormously different, Carrie's character was a bright and clever one and she seemed at times even more mature than her co-stars.

The film ends abruptly and happily but I would have much rather seen her fight harder and deal with more struggles than for her to only shed a few tears, and a year of extra studies before riding around the grounds of Oxford University campus on bicycle. Her character was almost heartless and disrespectful in the beginning and when she found out her first lover was married, I didn't find myself feeling sorry for her character in the least. I only saw how her foolishness took her there in the first place! I would have also liked to see the character Graham played by Mathew Beard, return in a more stunning light. He was a charming and humble boy that didn't have enough play; he certainly needed to have a turn of events in positive karma after the way she treated him previously. I in fact, related more to his character, and although he didn't have as many speaking parts, I felt his pain much more.

Friday, June 11, 2010

Life is Beautiful

! Bonjourno Principessa! -- Good Morning Princess! This was the phrase Roberto Benigni used to greet his wife on screen in this beautiful film. Although to many this simple expression has little meaning, he in fact radiated such respect and love; a love so guiltless, so pure, so true! I smile because once upon a time, I too was greeted with such love every morning too.

Life is Beautiful is an Italian film and is the winner of over 70 International Film Awards; Best Picture and Best Foreign Picture in the same year since 1969; 7 Academy Award nominations, taking home 3 for Best Dramatic Score, Best Actor and Best Foreign Language Film; Best Jewish Film and gaining the Medal of Jerusalem, and in Italy, the Best Film in 9 different categories; all in 1998.

Roberto Benigni is without a doubt one of my favourite people; someone I admire and look up to. My hero list isn't very long, but for this man, he makes my heart smile. He was one of the first and few creative and talented people to write, direct and act in his very own film; not only did he accomplish all this, but also won awards for his incredible masterpiece entitled 'La Vita e Bella', in English meaning 'Life is Beautiful'. It is such a powerful and epic tour de force that it motivates me as a human every time I watch it. His film talents are not only what astound me but also in person he is a charming, energetic and comical man, very optimistic and engaging.

This film shows the injustice of World War 2, of people facing tragedy of families separated but through it all Benigni shows courage, and uses physical humor to teach his son to have the desire to survive, to keep the hope and keep smiling. This film teaches its audience to have love, forgiveness and to be unstoppable even in suffering. It is filled with adventure, action, romance, sadness and loads of comedy.

Like another of my favourite Italian films, Cinema Paradiso, it is enchanting in a sense, because it brings imagination, family and love to the forefront, having these attributes conquer all. One feels empathy for its characters because the audience is taken on an extraordinary ride of love and life. When the character is happy, we smile, and when the character is dealt suffering, we feel also sadness.

This film always puts me in a better mood. Even though by the end my eyes are red and swollen, I know I've had a good laugh as well. Roberto Benigni is a tiny man with a giant's energy and he mirrors immaculately the late and great Charlie Chaplin (English actor whom American's claim as their own because of his extensive career in America); he is very animated with his movements as though he is dancing to the sweetest of music.

My favourite moments of the film; ones that stand out for me for different reasons would be when he was speaking to his uncle about serving and bowing; Roberto's character Guido said that he should bow very low to whomever he might serve, and his uncle corrected him and said: "Think of a sunflower. They bow to the sun. But if you see some that are bowed down…it means they are dead. You're serving, you're not a servant. Serving is a supreme art. God is the 1st servant, God serves men, but he's not a servant to men…" For me this statement is poignant because people never show respect for others with menial jobs like bus drivers, janitors, waiters, workers who pick ripe grapes in the field for wine, flight attendants etc. People look down on those who are there to help them and are demanding and greedy. But everybody's job is of importance and whether you want to admit it or not; we are all equal. Who cares what part we play, what uniform we wear and how many 'Get out of Jail Free' cards we may carry? When our life comes to an end, we all rot the same, and cannot take any of this with us. We may as well show each other reverence and respect.

I also loved that they brought to light the famous German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer who taught us that with willpower you can accomplish anything; you are who you want to be! What you wish for yourself is literally in your power; therefore have no fear and expect great things to be yours after you've done the right things.

The riddles throughout the film were quite refreshing as well; I may not be the smartest of cookies but I love a good puzzle and always love coming up with new strategies to get what I want in life. Some work; others do not; but it's always fun setting them up to solve.

I really needed to see this film again today; to remind myself that yes indeed 'Life is Beautiful', and that I am free to be who I am and to speak the truth; and even if people laugh at me or say that I take life too seriously; I know who I am and what I want, and if serious is me being passionate and honest about my life; and giggles and laughter should come about because I hug and dance with a container of oatmeal because it brings me fond memories, then so be it. I will cry when I want to, and laugh when I want to and speak the truth of how I feel when I wish to because it allows me to sleep well at night; there are no elephants standing in my room; for this I am grateful for and I shan't ask any more questions but simply smile through the painful days.

I will leave you with some wise words of Roberto Benigni who said:"Sometimes only clowns can reach real tragedy!" J


"Don't speak to me, unless you speak American!" this is the last line of the film called 'Crash'. Written by Bobby Moresco and directed by Paul Haggis; Canadian filmmaker. I'd never been enormously fond of policemen, in fact never been even the least fond of policemen…well maybe this one time when a police officer named Martin gave me a ride back to my car when I was stranded after having my car impounded; it was kind of fun riding in the back of his car, like I was in a scene of a movie or something, or maybe this one other time speaking with the son of a police officer, he seemed to be a pretty decent fella', so I suppose his father couldn't be that much a terror.

Crash is a film about the ugly truth; it's about prejudice, racism, fear, hope, and about how human lives are interwoven between each other; it is a heartwarming tale that takes you on a passionate journey within. Of the similarities and differences that each of us take, somewhat laughable, and many times embarrassing of how we treat and view our fellow man.

I loved the transition shots and the soundtrack was ideal for the thrilling and extreme scenes throughout the film. Crash shows that there is evil within us all; anger, fear, and ugliness that often times overpower even the best of us. It tries to remind us to not judge a book by its cover and form intolerance and discrimination against other people. There are scenes in this film that I feel many people can relate with; and things are said that would often time only discussed behind closed doors.

I find this film to be quite an enjoyable one, however I cannot say that it is the most ingenious and unique technique used for the story line. As in the flawlessly made French film 'Happenstance' the system of using related lives and turn of events has indeed been done before. What is distinctive in this film is that it is set in Los Angeles, a very eclectic place with unpredictable circumstances because of intolerance. It also has a cast filled with iconic actors like Brendan Fraser, Don Cheadle, Matt Dillon, Sandra Bullock, and Thandie Newton (British actress) to name a few.

Adventurous stories armed with power struggles combined into one; a must-see film in my book. J

It's not ALL about the money!

One can gain knowledge from books, but I find that simply sitting next to a complete stranger, one can gain the wisest and most heartrending of insights. It was at such a meeting that I expanded on my awareness. Waiting for the bus, in the wee hours of the morning, I sat next to a stranger. He was an older man, dressed grimily and he greeted me with a smile and offered a seat next to him. I wasn't really in the mood for talking; I felt a bit down, not really because I had a long day, but because I had felt defeated yet again even though I tried to do the right thing. This man was from the Philippines; I hadn't had the opportunity to visit as yet, but I knew a great deal about his country

He started off by asking me if I had to work the following day. I frowned and explained that I would be 'on-call' and hadn't flown today either. He smiled and told me at least I got paid for the hours I was at the airport; he exclaimed knowingly, "It's NOT all about the money!" He said that he had the following 4 days off, and that Thursday there was the Lakers game, Friday the World Cup and then on Saturday another Lakers game, he chuckled to himself; his wrinkled nose folding in and out as he laughed. He repeated to me, "It's NOT all about the money!" He continued, "It's about time spent with family and friends, it's about nature and about enjoying life, it's about happiness and about health. He said Americans were all about work, work, work, and then working some over-time too. He called them a sue-happy country, and that for them it was all about the money!

I smiled at him and nodded, because I had heard 2 stories that day about people suing companies for the silliest things. One incident was of a woman who purchased a cup of coffee at McDonalds, she went to her table, sat down and accidentally (I would assume/hope) spilled the coffee on her leg. She sued the company saying that the coffee was too hot; McDonalds had to pay a whopping $250,000 because of it. And then earlier this morning, a policeman on motorcycle collided with a car on the infamous 405 highway, and the policeman was in critical condition, and the other driver was injured but said that he was going to sue because of the car accident. It made me really wonder about the people living here. My Pilipino stranger told me that although he had been living here in the United States for many years he always tried to visit home at least once a year; to get a good dose of his culture and his people and remember his serious upbringing.

He told me he was married for 25 years, and asked me if I was married too. I shook my head and smiled, the older I got, and more often I'd hear that question asked. Many of my friends were already married, some already popping out babies too. I told him he was lucky to have a companion, someone to share with and speak about his day. He agreed, he said that after all the sex, if you didn't have companionship, you'd have nothing. I agreed; several times I'd try to develop something like this, and always something seemed to squash my vision; it was as though I'd been doomed for love; but I knew it was just not the right time yet; because every morning I woke up, I would be one day closer to that special bond with my equal.

He told me, "You're a pretty girl, tall, good job, an education, you don't have to worry!" I was laughing hysterically in my head; because this night I didn't see it that simply. I knew that I shouldn't worry, but I did most times anyway; trait handed down from my father I suppose. He overcame it though and for many years now he was the master of his thoughts; I was still working on mastering this craft. The man went on to tell me that I should always take things slow, never be in a rush, that he dated his wife for 2 years before he got married.

"Marrying an American can also be tricky!" he declared, explaining to me that for them it was more about instant gratification and after getting sex, they are ready for another person. They do not try to work out differences, compromise or listen to each other, they automatically think; if this is too hard, then let's just get a divorce.

He taught me of the 3 rings in marriage.

The Engagement Ring

The Wedding Ring and

The Suffer-Ring.

We laughed heartily together at this. He said without trust, faithfulness and communication, then there is no marriage, no relationship, and no hope. The bus pulled up shortly after this. I probably will never see this man again; but it is nights like these, when things seem daunting and cheerless that the easiest thing to do is to sit next to a stranger and have your energy restored. J

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Todo me parece bonito

Everything seems beautiful to me...

Bonito by Jarabe de Palo, wonderful song by an Italian singer. The words are soothing and real; because despite days where you feel like curling in a corner and listening to Billie Holiday one must always remember the truth.

The truth is the truth and will always be the truth.

Don't fear it; embrace it, with all its thorns, all its meaning...Acceptance. Now may not be the time, so let it be, and be free! Know your value and worth and never settle for less. :)

Short and sweet today! :)

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Dominion Status

So, this past weekend, besides baking in the sun and hiking around Runyon Canyon, I happened to visit Huntington Beach for a little pool/beach/house party. I'm so glad I went. My girlfriend and I hadn't seen each other for a while and so it was nice to talk about boys (yes, that's mostly what we talk about) together again.

After realizing that we couldn't swim because the sea wasn't very warm, and couldn't really tan (not that I really needed to), because the breeze was quite strong, we decided to go to another friend's house to sit for a while in the jacuzzi and then head on to the main 'house' party.

I must admit growing up in Trinidad & Tobago, living in sunshine 24/7 and living 5 minutes from the beach, I didn't worry too much about fashion. This posed as a slight problem that weekend though, because I just wore my swimsuit, shorts and a t-shirt, with no-make up and a pair of beat-up slippers. Much to my dismay, every one there were the next Lindsay Lohans and Paris' Hiltons. Loads of make-up, enormous bags, heels and boots....yes BOOTS! The girls were wearing boots in a beach-town. My friend told me ... "This is the OC Jair..." which means, this is 'Orange County'. Ahh yess...even though I didn't watch the reality television programs, I knew she was speaking about people from 'Laguna Beach' and 'The Hills'.

I was slowly deteriorating in the middle of the party. I felt fine, but people were looking at me and judging me, I could feel it. Then I heard some music. I thought, my, they even have a live band, wonderful! I stepped outside and all my thoughts slipped away. I had stepped into the world of Dominion Status!

Dominion Status lead by Dereck Blackman is a band here in South California that play lovely and unique music. They were from Trinidad & Tobago and Jamaica! Immediately I felt as though I was home. I closed my eyes and swayed to the music -- it was just me and them. The excitement didn't end there. The band leader, Dereck Blackman came up to me and began conversing with me. He was also from Trinidad & Tobago, and knew some of the same people I knew too. His brother was one of my favourite artists/singers Isaac Blackman who sang 'Jumping up to the Ceiling' and his father was a Trinbagonian icon named 'Ras-Shorti-I'.

I was so honored to speak with him and find out these tremendous things, that I couldn't wipe the smile from off my face. He gave me 2 of his CD's and his business cards and said to keep in touch. I earnestly wanted him to sign them, but my friends and I decided to leave early and then we never came back.

I've been listening to 'The Blame Game' non-stop since I've gotten it, and to me it sounds like a cross between 'Seal' and 'Lenny Kravitz'...still with a Caribbean flair/flavour. Very enjoyable indeed. The lyrics sung by Dereck Blackman are all positive and inspiring and the music makes you want to dance or sing along.

I would certainly recommend checking out music from this band: Dominion Status.

This certainly shows the range, the talent and the uniqueness of what the Caribbean, and Trinidad & Tobago has to offer :) My favourites are: 'The Blame Game', 'Forgive' & 'Everything'.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Joy in my Heart

I remember reading once somewhere something quite ordinary, but today I find that simple statement quite extraordinary. It read 'Life changes, think ahead'. Hmmm… yes indeed it does. In fact it changes whether one is ready for it or not. One day could be lovely, pretty and hopeful, and the next gruesome and daunting. How can we plan ahead for these changes we wonder? Well the answer is quite simple actually; it is keeping in mind that life is impermanent.

Impermanence means that nothing is forever. I learnt about this as a small girl, but didn't understand it fully or liked to hear it, but yes it is the truth. The truth is the truth is the truth, no ifs, ands, or buts, it just is, and it is wise to speak the truth, for the truth could never be a bad thing.

So therefore if nothing lasts forever, except maybe love. Or so my hopeless romantic heart would like to think; knowing this we should try not to become attached to certain circumstances or conditions. Change is inevitable; and it is not necessarily a bad thing, but in fact a prerequisite. A prerequisite in life that is! Just as the tides change in the sea; and the weather turns from winter to spring; or a baby grows its first teeth; just so also do relationships evolve, situations adjust and circumstances transform. How should we deal with this you ask? Simple, we must also change, and be resilient. It is only through positivity and understanding are we able to flourish as an individual.

Yesterday was Memorial Day in America, and many people have the day off to spend time with friends and family. Boys watch games and drink beer, girls talk and talk and talk, and I suppose drink too. I spent it hiking and laying the sun, in the evening I did meet up with some friends. And underneath the laughter and drinking and games I thought about my childhood friend.

Her name was Sunita Maraj, she was a year or so older than me. A simple girl, she didn't seem very bright in primary school; I knew that because I would let her copy my work as we sat next to each other. She was called names, and no one would play with her, because she smelt of coconut oil. She had a best friend in me, I didn't care about that smell and she was brilliant in my eyes. She made me laugh, and she was always at my side. Time passed and we lost touch, but I'm sure if I saw her today we would still have the same love for each other. Sunita died yesterday; I was given the news by my father. She was so young, childless, probably didn't work in her dream career or have the opportunity to travel the world. And she was killed; in the most horrific way. She makes number 6 of my friends dying tragically within the past 3 years. It saddens me at moments, but I know that she came to learn lessons in this life and inspire and evoke some type of change with this experience for also the people around her and in her life. An example of sorts; meaning many different things for many different people, and for me again, I think that of impermanence.

I was doing some light reading the other day, which I will share with you:

Impermanency and Egolessness –

…Though both body and mind appear because of cooperating causes, it does not follow that there is an ego-personality. As the body of flesh is an aggregate of elements, it is, therefore, impermanent. If the body were an ego-personality, it could do this and that as it would determine. A king has the power to praise or punish as he wishes, but he becomes ill despite his intent or desire, he comes to old age unwillingly, and his fortune and his wishes often have little to do with each other. Neither is the mind the ego-personality. The human is an aggregate of causes and conditions. It is in constant change. If the mind were an ego-personality, it could do this and that as it would determine; but the mind often flies from what it knows is right and chases after evil reluctantly. Still, nothing seems to happen exactly as its ego desires.

The human mind, in its never-ending changes, is like the flowing water of river or the burning flame of a candle; like an ape, it is forever jumping about, not ceasing for even a moment. A wise man, seeing and hearing such, should break away from any attachment to body or mind…

[Excerpt from The Teaching of Buddha]

And for those of you who aren't as jolly and free with different texts or thinking there is also a wonderful story of a man named Job. It is one of my favourites actually. It is about a man, a very wealthy man who had everything. He had a beautiful wife and many children, and lavish feasts and vast fields and many cattle. One day Lucifer was conversing with God and said, "I bet you that if you took everything away from Job, he would no longer worship you…" God smiled and said, "Ah but you are wrong, Job is a good man with plenty faith and will never forsake me…" Lucifer replied, "Really? Well let me have a go at him, and we'll see how strong his faith really is!" And so it was that Lucifer tested him and made his life a living hell…literally. He lost his wife and his children died, and his crops were eaten by pests, and he lost his posh house and many friends, he even became very ill, with revolting sores all over his body, and became emaciated. Lucifer said to him, "Curse God and I will give back to you all that you have lost…" But Job did not, his body was weak, but his mind was stronger and he gave thanks for the little he had, he knew that he could overcome it and with his undying faith he would once again be happy and strong. Because of his unswerving faith, God didn't give him what he'd lost, he blessed him with three times as much; more than he could have ever imagined.

I rather enjoy this story; and I believe it also speaks of impermanence in life, because you can lose valuable things in the blink of an eye. Personal material belongings, family to death, love lost, your health, it is endless, that is why with each day be grateful, for despite walking in the darkness of life, we must go bravely and smile through our suffering, before each step know that ground will appear and you won't fall, and if you do happen to stumble in the dark, you can get back up and truly shine and be blessed after your lessons in adversity! It is only through the stumbles and falls that we get extra points and bonuses on the tests in life! J

I think of times when I'd wake up with so much joy in my heart, greeted with such love and understanding and beauty, and sure enough as often times predicted, it is taken away from me; only for a fleeting moment, for a season, for a lesson. I yearn for stability at some point, for the strength of eternity, for lasting love, like grains of sand on the beach…or a rock, it will always be solid, it will always be there; you can move a rock, but you cannot change its feelings or who it is! So have joy in your heart always despite the lesson, despite the change that befalls us, we may not be able to see the big picture now but it is Oh So Perfect!

A childhood song that Sunita and I sang:

I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy

Down in my heart,


Down in my heart


Down in my heart

I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy

Down in my heart

Down in my heart to stayyyyy!

Rest in peace, my dear friend, Sunita J