My First Audition

So most of my life I've always been in the background; literally scooping up pieces of paper from the ground in Musicals, and playing harmony instead of sweet melody in my steel-orchestras, being yelled at as a Production Assistant or Director's assistant on film sets in Trinidad & Tobago, standing in the back of photographs because I happened to be one of the tallest, or being polite as to let others go before me because it would make them happy. Here in America, which is a much bigger pond I aim to shine for once in my life; it may sound a bit silly coming to a much larger pond and hoping to succeed, but I want to prove to myself that I am just as talented as those who've been littering the stage, bragging about their more challenging music scores, sure that they in fact have insight well beyond others who work behind the scenes on set, or those who believe that they should be the center of attention at all times. It's not that I want to be a self-centered, obnoxious, and a boisterous individual; but I want to be "Just as good" or even better because of the ladder I've had to climb thus far. I know who I am and what I want, and I deserve also happiness, success and a desire to become the best that I can be…the greatest act is yet to come…

My love of film really goes beyond the petty aspirations of fame, it goes for respect of the craft, it goes for marvelous art that is constructed, for the story that inspires and evoke positive change, for warm tears and belly-full of laughs, for family gatherings and cuddling of boyfriends and girlfriends, for the simple fact that without it my life wouldn't make very much sense. I adore every aspect of what film has to offer, I have worked behind the scenes and am learning of what it's like being in front of the scenes and I find it all very irresistible…kind of like on the same scale of being infatuated with a boy; except it never leaves me or hurts me…. And I will always love him. Yes; I love film a great deal and I would love to be able to re-incarnate myself as many times in this life alone!

I had my first audition yesterday, and I'm quite sure by the stories I've heard from acquaintances and friends alike in the film business of how crazy at times they may be, I must say that for my first official audition though, it went quite smoothly. Perhaps because I was so excited that I was actually doing what I had practiced so many times before; in my classes and in the mirror.

The valet men all complimented me and said good-luck, there was an old man with shiny grey hair on the ride up in the elevator, who said I had a beautiful smile, and when I arrived to the suite, there wasn't a queue of people in sight. I signed in and the producer noticing me came outside his glass office to ask my name and shake my hand. He handed me a couple pages of script to practice before coming in and I filled out some paperwork. I giggled like a silly school-girl at the "How's my cleavage?" line as I wondered how far would I have to arch my back to show any cleavage at all. [Haha]

I don't think I got the part, partly because I couldn't wipe that tremendous and ridiculous grin off my face because I was so elated, and partly because the producer believes I need more experience in general. I've done quite a bit of work behind the scenes, but not in front of the scenes and not in the US; and so the journey continues…

I'm happy though, because even though I didn't get the part, the producer liked my personality and still wants to work with me and help me with my passion. He was pretty impressed that I play the steel-pan (drum) and he said even though I was a 'very' sexy young lady that I needed to have a professional head-shot at hand. I was proud to show him online that I did have headshots taken, but realized I should have them printed out and ready to disperse.

It's not easy being a flight attendant and scurrying from a flight to an audition, but next time I'll be better prepared. I'll have my headshots ready and in a bundle and I'll let them know that I've been playing the steel-pan (drum) for 18 years (that might make them smile a bit more)…and maybe I'll wear a shirt that allows me easy access of buttons for an extra peek-a-boo of needed cleavage. Who knows!? [Haha] I'm just grateful for the experience and the advice he had to give me, the most important being that I should forget all the negativity around me and never give up on my dream, just keep at it and it'll eventually payoff. J